3 years...

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Dad -

It's been 3 years since I said goodbye to you... over e-mail. I wish I would have told everyone to just hold the phones so I could fly back up there and be by your side when they pulled the plug, but I just couldn't. I couldn't stand to feel so helpless again. Besides, that would be doing it for me, not you. You didn't deserve to suffer any more.

I was so filled with hope on April 8, 2006 when you came out of your Atavan induced coma. By the 19th though, I had realized the inevitable... you were not going to survive. The infection was too stong and your organs were shutting down. What a bunch of bullshit.

We still speak to each other in dreams, and I hope that cosmically, we really are communicating. I joked about it at first, but I think that there really is a part of you in your grandson Sam... he even looks like you. I don't think I'll ever get over the whole ordeal, but it gets easier each day. I miss you badly dad.  Talk to you again in my dreams.

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This page contains a single entry by Budkin published on April 22, 2009 4:01 PM.

Happy Father's Day Dad was the previous entry in this blog.

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